Hi all And finally 2016 draws to a close... been a rather hectic year, full of political drama globally, and famous people dropping like flies ... On the positive side, summer has finally arrived down here in the Cape. Over at the air-conditioned cinemas, this week sees the sexy space thriller Passengers, as well as Mel Gibson's comeback film Hacksaw Ridge. Also up we have a local Afrikaans dark comedy, as well as another take on the "meet the parents" genre from Hollywood. Lastly the popular series of teen novels about life in American "middle school" makes the transition to the big screen. No previews this week, please take care over New Year ... Enjoy :-) M O V I E S Released 30 December 2016 * Passengers (PG10-12 SV) * Passengers (3D) (PG10-12 SV) * Hacksaw Ridge (16 V) * Why Him? (16 L) * Middle School: The Worst Years of My Life * Snaaks Genoeg (13 LV) * Assassin's Creed (4DX) (PG10-12 V) http://www.moviesite.co.za/new.htm SA Top Tens (commercial, Nouveau, best and worst movies on circuit) http://www.moviesite.co.za/topten.htm The US and UK Top Tens. Industry news updated daily. http://www.moviesite.co.za/news/newsitem.htm Showtimes (all Ster-Kinekor, Nu Metro, MovieZone, CineCentre, Movies@, Labia) http://www.moviesite.co.za/where.htm Forthcoming attractions for 6 January http://www.moviesite.co.za/4thcome.htm Updated the pic and quote on the home page http://www.moviesite.co.za/ This Week's pinup http://www.moviesite.co.za/pinup.html (full HD wallpaper) Pick of the Week http://www.moviesite.co.za/pick.htm All the previews. Remember to check with the cinema first. http://www.moviesite.co.za/where/previews.htm List of all movies showing http://www.moviesite.co.za/reviews.htm Same list sorted by Age Restriction http://www.moviesite.co.za/showingbyage.htm Top Ten and Worst Ten Movies by Critical Rating http://www.moviesite.co.za/topten.htm Remember you can support the site by reading the ads... :-) Cheers, Ian -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- An update on an oldie After Quasimodo's death, the bishop of the Cathedral of Notre Dame sent word through the streets of Paris that a new bell ringer was needed. The bishop decided that he would conduct the interviews personally and went up into the belfry to begin the screening process. After observing several applicants demonstrate their skills, he had decided to call it a day. Just then, an armless man approached him and announced that he was there to apply for the bell ringer's job. The bishop was incredulous. 'You have no arms ! 'No matter,' said the man. 'Observe !' And he began striking the bells with his face, producing a beautiful melody on the carillon. The bishop listened in astonishment; convinced he had finally found a replacement for Quasimodo. But suddenly, as he rushed forward to strike the bell, the armless man tripped and plunged headlong out of the belfry window to his death in the street below. The stunned bishop rushed down two hundred and ninety five church steps, when he reached the street, a crowd had gathered around the fallen figure, drawn by the beautiful music they had heard only moment before. As they silently parted to let the bishop through, one of them asked, 'Bishop, who was this man ?'.. 'I don't know his name,' the bishop sadly replied, ' .................... BUT HIS FACE RINGS A BELL' The following day, despite the sadness that weighed heavily on his heart due to the unfortunate death of the armless campanologist, the bishop continued his interviews for the bell ringer of Notre Dame. The first man to approach him said, 'Your Excellency, I am the brother of the poor armless wretch that fell to his death from this very belfry yesterday. I pray that you honour his life by allowing me to replace him in this duty.' The bishop agreed to give the man an audition, and, as the armless man's brother stooped to pick up a mallet to strike the first bell, he groaned, clutched at his chest, twirled around, and died on the spot. Two monks, hearing the bishop's cries of grief at this second tragedy, rushed up the stairs to his side. 'What has happened ? Who is this man ?' the first monk asked breathlessly. 'I don't know his name,' sighed the distraught bishop, 'but....' 'HE'S A DEAD RINGER FOR HIS BROTHER.' -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Santa Claus at the shopping mall was very surprised when Emily, young lady aged about 20 years old walked up and sat on his lap. Now, we all know that Santa doesn't usually take requests from adults, but she smiled very nicely at him, so he asked her, 'What do you want for Christmas?' 'Something for my mother, please,' replied Emily sweetly. 'Something for your mother? Well, that's very loving and thoughtful of you,' smiled Santa. 'What do would you like me to bring her?' Without turning a hair Emily answered quickly, 'A son-in-law.' -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The judge asked the defendant what he was charged with. "Doing my Christmas shopping early," was the reply. "That not illegal! How early were you shopping?" "Before the store was open." -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I love CHRISTMAS LIGHTS, they remind me of Politicians. They all hang together, half don't work, and the ones that do aren't very bright. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A group of 40 years old buddies discuss and discuss where they should meet for dinner.. Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at the Gausthof zum Lowen restaurant because the waitress's there have low cut blouses and nice breasts. 10 years later, at 50 years of age, the group meets again and once again they discuss and discuss where they should meet. Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at the Gausthof zum Lowen because the food there is very good and the wine selection is good also.. 10 years later at 60 years of age, the group meets again and once again they discuss and discuss where they should meet. Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at the Gausthof zum Lowen because they can eat there in peace and quiet and the restaurant is smoke free. 10 years later, at 70 years of age, the group meets again and once again they discuss and discuss where they should meet. Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at the Gausthof zum Lowen because the restaurant is wheel chair accessible and they even have an elevator. 10 years later, at 80 years of age, the group meets again and once again they discuss and discuss where they should meet. Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at the Gausthof zum Lowen because that would be a great idea because they have never been there before. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away.. Florida or the moon?" The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida?????" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Political correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a t*rd by the clean end. " --------------------------------------------------------------------------------