Newsletter and jokes 25 January 2019


 
Hi all 
 
It's a "local is lekker" weekend this week, as we have no less than three 
local new releases, headlined by the adult drama Dominee Tienie. (Well, it 
is PG10-12 but the target market is adult.) 
 
That's joined by family (as in: about a family) drama 3 Days to Go, which  
seeks to find comedy in dark matters, and finally the adults-only coming- 
of-age adventure Matwetwe, set in Atteridgeville. 
 
From abroad, we've got one film with Oscar hopes (If Beale Street Could  
Talk) and one about famous (and ailing) US Supreme Court judge Ruth Bader  
Ginsburg. BTW the Oscar noms are out, the main ones are here: 
 
https://www.moviesite.co.za/news/oscars.htm  
 
and of course, the Razzies... 
https://www.moviesite.co.za/news/razzie.htm  
where Gotti and Holmes & Watson are strong contenders. 
 
The last commercial Hollywood release this week is sci-fi thriller  
Replicas, which was not well-received abroad. 
 
From the subcontinent we have three offerings, Manikarnika: The Queen of  
Jhansi, Thackeray and Mr. Majnu. 
 
Lastly, on the previews side, there are isolated previews for upcoming 
animated dragon tale How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World, both 2D 
and 3D, and horror thriller The Possession of Hannah Grace. See the  
previews page and remember to book. 
 
Enjoy :-) 
 
 
Releasing 25 January 2019 
 
* Dominee Tienie (PG10-12 L) 
* 3 Days to Go (13 LVD) 
* If Beale Street Could Talk (18 LNSVPD SV) 
* On the Basis of Sex (13 LSPD) 
* Replicas (13 LV) 
* Matwetwe (16 LSVD) 
* Manikarnika: The Queen of Jhansi (Hindi) 
* Thackeray (Hindi) 
* Mr. Majnu (Teluga) 
 
http://www.moviesite.co.za/new.htm   
 
Forthcoming attractions 
http://www.moviesite.co.za/4thcome.htm  
 
Updated the pic and quote on the home page 
http://www.moviesite.co.za/  
 
This Week's pinup 
http://www.moviesite.co.za/pinup.html (Cellphone wallpaper ...)  
 
Pick of the Week 
http://www.moviesite.co.za/pick.htm   
 
All the previews. Remember to check with the cinema first. 
http://www.moviesite.co.za/where/previews.htm  
 
List of all movies showing 
http://www.moviesite.co.za/reviews.htm  
 
Same list sorted by Age Restriction 
http://www.moviesite.co.za/showingbyage.htm  
 
Top Twenty, Best and Worst Movies by Critical Rating. 
http://www.moviesite.co.za/topten.htm  
 
Remember you can support the site by reading the ads... :-) 
 
Cheers, Ian 
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
 
Mail from the bank was piling up for my daughter, who was away at college.  
 
So I called her. “Open one up and see what it is,” she said. 
 
I unsealed an envelope. “It says your account has insufficient funds.” 
 
“That’s got to be a mistake,” she said. “I still have plenty of cheques 
left.” 
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
 
Our two-year-old daughter was sitting quietly in church one Sunday when she  
became mesmerized by a balding man seated in front. Her curiosity got the  
better of her, and she shouted for all to hear, 
 
“Why is that man’s head coming out of his hair?” 
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
 
While playing catch with my young son, I accidentally sent the ball sailing  
over his head. “Sorry, that was a bad throw,” I said. 
 
He smiled kindly. “No, Daddy, that was a wonderful toss.”  
 
Then, taking two steps toward the ball, he stopped and added,  
“When we say something nice even when we don’t mean it at all, that’s  
called being polite, right?” 
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
 
Anklebiters.... 
 
After catching her five-year-old son trying to pull a fast one, his mother  
demanded, “Do you think I have idiot written on my forehead?” 
 
He answered, “I don’t know. I can’t read.” 
 
 
Watching his mother apply nail polish, the five-year-od asked,  
“Why are you doing that?” 
 
“It’s just something ladies do in order to look nice,” she said. 
 
He considered this a minute before asking, “So, are you a kind of lady?” 
 
 
As he got his diaper changed, Daniel looked down and said, “I have a  
wee-wee. Daddy has a wee-wee.” 
 
“That’s right,” said his mother. “That’s because you’re both boys. 
Do you know what mommies have?” 
Daniel did: “Earrings.” 
 
 
My three-year-old granddaughter was fascinated by a family friend nursing  
her baby. 
 
“She’s having milk for her breakfast,” the friend explained. 
 
Intrigued, my granddaughter asked,  
“Is there orange juice in the other one?” 
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
 
I’ve been working on my PhD in engineering for the past five years, but my  
kids don’t necessarily see that as work. 
 
As we were driving past Walmart one day, my son spotted a Now Hiring sign  
and suggested that I could get a job there. 
 
Hoping to make a point, I asked, “Do you think they’re looking for an  
engineer?” 
 
“Oh, sure,” he said. “They’ll hire anybody.” 
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
 



Xax International logo
 Xax International
 2019
 All rights reserved.