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Newsletter and jokes: 5 April 2019

Hi all

We're heading towards the US "summer blockbuster" season and the first
warmup film arrives today. Aimed at a slightly younger audience than the 
typical PG-13 superhero movie, and going for the laughs, it is expected to
land with a bang globally.

The rest of the main-stream lineup is adults only, which I suppose is to 
be expected post-holidays. First up is local rom-com Love Lives Here, while
we have another local film, a modern and Afrikaans adaptation of Anton 
Chekhov's novel The Seagull, releasing as Die Seemeeu, which is showing
at the art-circuit-and-similar venues.

Also on the same limited circuit is an offbeat crime-action-drama called
Galveston, which has picked up two nominations but no US release yet.

Lastly, Bollywood has a spy action thriller in the form of "Romeo. Akbar. 
Walter." Clearly a man with many personalities :-)

On the previews side, there are Girls Night Out previews next Wednesday and
Thursday evenings for the upcoming comedy Little, and a solitary preview 
for kiddies animated film The Queen's Corgi on Saturday. See the previews
page and remember to book.

Enjoy :-)

Releasing 5 April 2019

* Shazam! (3D) (PG LVH IAT)
* Shazam! (PG LVH IAT)
* Shazam! (3D IMAX) (PG LVH IAT)
* Shazam! (4DX) (PG LVH IAT)
* Love Lives Here (16 LSD)
* Die Seemeeu (16 LSVD IAT)
* Galveston (16 LNSVD)
* Romeo. Akbar. Walter. (Hindi) 

Forthcoming attractions

Updated the pic and quote on the home page

This Week's pinup (>Full HD wallpaper ...)

Pick of the Week 

All the previews. Remember to check with the cinema first.

List of all movies showing

Same list sorted by Age Restriction

Top Twenty, Best and Worst Movies by Critical Rating.

Remember you can support the site by reading the ads... :-)

Cheers, Ian


One of the most popular questions asked at our family restaurant is 
“What’s good tonight?”

Now, we would never serve anything we didn’t think was good. 
So I braced myself one Saturday night when I heard the dreaded question 
posed to my husband.

He calmly replied, “Anything over R149.95.”


A new salesman saw the nameplate on my desk and said, “Sibyl Short. That’s 
easy to remember, since you’re short.” 

The next time he visited our office, he approached me with a big smile and 
stated with great confidence, “Hello, Ms. Stout!”


After giving a guided tour of Old Key West, I reminded my clients to catch 
the great sunset at 7:15.

“I can’t make it tonight,” a woman said. “When’s the next sunset?”


Client: We need you to log in to the YouTube and make all our company 
videos viral.


I work for the transportation department at a university. 

One day, a student came in to buy a parking permit. 

“What’s your license plate number?” I asked.

She responded, “Front or back?”


A woman called our airline customer-service desk asking if she could take 
her dog on board.

“Sure,” I said, “as long as you provide your own kennel.” 

I further explained that the kennel needed to be large enough for the dog 
to stand up, sit down, turn around, and roll over.

The customer was flummoxed: “I’ll never be able to teach him all of that by


We were making leaflets for a local church, and the client wanted a logo 
designed with Earth being shielded by the hand of God. 

I sent the client a proof. 

Shortly thereafter, I got a call.

“The hand looks too human. Please use a hand that looks more like God’s.”

Shazam! (4DX)Love Lives HereShazam!GalvestonShazam! (3D)
Romeo. Akbar. Walter.Shazam! (3D IMAX)Die Seemeeu
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