Newsletter and jokes 29 November 2019

Hi all 
I'm seeing a lot of references to today being some sort of black day, I  
guess it's some new version of unlucky Friday 13th or something.... 
Anyway the exams are done for most people, and while we wait for Frozen II 
to land next week, we have a mixed bag of interesting films for your  
entertainment. In some ways its a tale of two worlds... some films were  
well received by both critics and public, and others where the critics went 
"meh" and the public went "Ooh, shiny!" 
As per usual we start with the family fare, which is Playing with Fire,  
about a group of firemen who get to look after a handful of kids (which is 
now officially the designated collective noun...). 
Couples' Night is also suitable for a younger audience, but whether the  
subject matter will interest them, I don't know. It does not seem to have 
had a theatrical release in the USA so reviews are scarce. 
Moving on to the adult fare, the big release this week is the crime  
thriller 21 Bridges, which has had a mixed response from the critics and 
rave reviews from the public.  
Keeping with the crime theme, we have Knives Out, an Agatha-Christie style 
murder mystery which seems to please everyone. It's also a crossover  
release, on the art circuit and many commercial venues. 
On the art-circuit-and-similar, we have The Good Liar, which features two 
veteran actors at the top of their game. 
From the subcontinent, we have the Hindi action thriller Commando 3, and 
the Tamil action drama Enai Noki Paayum Thota. 
But wait! There's more! It's the Frozen previews! Just about everywhere, 
on Sunday afternoon, multiple shows and formats. Get the jump on your  
friends and see it first :-).. then you can annoy them by singing the new  
songs at school on Monday... 
There are also a few previews for the Christmas rom-com Last Christmas, at 
selected venues on Wednesday evening, and Official Secrets and Pain and  
Glory are playing as part of the film festival on at Nouveau Rosebank. 
Lastly, there is the filmed theatre production Hansard screening at the  
Nouveaus, as well as the opera Madama Butterfly at the Nouveaus and some 
selected venues. 
Enjoy :-) 
Released 29 November 2019 
* Playing With Fire (PG) 
* Knives Out (16 LVD) 
* The Good Liar (16 LV SV) 
* 21 Bridges (16 LVD) 
* Couples' Night (13 L) 
* Commando 3 (Hindi) 
* Enai Noki Paayum Thota (Tamil)   
Forthcoming attractions  
Updated the pic and quote on the home page  
This Week's pinup (full HD wallpaper ...)  
Pick of the Week   
All the previews. Remember to check with the cinema first.  
List of all movies showing  
Same list sorted by Age Restriction  
Top Twenty, Best and Worst Movies by Critical Rating.  
Remember you can support the site by reading the ads... :-) 
Cheers, Ian 
I went to a really tough high school. In English class my teacher told us  
to make an outline, and someone asked, “Where’s the body?” 
“Mom, I won’t go to school anymore.” 
“Why, my dear?” 
“It doesn’t make sense. I can’t read yet, and they don’t let me talk.” 
I don’t know how to speed-read. Instead, I listen to Books on Tape on  
Sylvia: “Dad, can you write in the dark?” 
Father: “I think so. What do you want me to write?” 
Sylvia: “Your signature on this school report card.” 
My eight-year-old brother was doing his homework but was stumped by a maths  
“Katie,” he asked our six-year-old sister, “what would I get if I added  
seven apples and six apples?” 
“I don’t know,” she replied. “In my maths class, we use oranges.” 
My dog licked the crumbs out of my computer keyboard and earned an online  
college degree. 
Did you hear about the cannibal who was expelled from school? 
He was buttering up his teacher. 
A secondary-school student came home one night rather depressed.  
“What’s the matter, son?” asked his father. 
“Bad news, Dad,” said the boy. “It’s my grades. They’re all wet.” 
“What do you mean ‘all wet’?” 
“Below C-level,” replied the son. 
“Can people predict the future?” my seven-year-old granddaughter asked her  
older, wiser sisters. 
“Yes,” Rebecca replied, “Mom can.” 
“Really?” Samantha exclaimed. 
“Yep,” Rebecca continued.  
“She can take one look at your report card and tell you what will happen  
when Dad gets home.” 
“Daddy, they call me Mafioso at school.” 
“Don’t worry, son. I’ll take care of it tomorrow.” 
“OK Dad, but please make it look like an accident.” 
“Who were the first people in the Garden of Eden?” asked the Sunday school  
Replied one small child, “The Adams family.” 
First mother: “How’s your son getting on at medical school?” 
Second mother: “I don’t know, I can’t read his letters.” 

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