Newsletter and jokes 18 September 2020

Hi all 
It's a short week this week, with the new movies opening on the public 
holiday next Thursday. 
For this week we're getting back to normality, with five new releases. 
Starting at the Kiddie end, we have the sequel to Trolls, in Trolls World 
Tour. This was originally scheduled for about when lockdown kicked in. 
Also suitable for a younger audience is the offbeat comedy Bill & Ted Face  
the Music, which is on limited release. 
Then we have two arthouse releases, Misbehaviour and A Million Little Pieces. 
Misbehaviour, which is also family-friendly, has been doing great business 
down here at The Labia, and is now opening in Gauteng. A Million Little  
Pieces is the adults-only film version of the "memoir" heavily promoted by 
Oprah Winnfrey a few years back, which embarrassingly turned out to be more 
novel than memoir. 
The fifth film this week is the sequel to After, After We Collided, offering 
more steamy young-adult passion, and based on the novel of the same name. 
Enjoy! :-) 
Cheers, Ian 
New this week 
* Trolls World Tour (PG V PPS) 
* Trolls World Tour (3D) (PG V PPS) 
* Bill & Ted Face the Music (PG10-12 LVHD) 
* Misbehaviour (PG10-12 LVP) 
* After We Collided (16 LNSVPD) 
* A Million Little Pieces (16 LNVD)   
Forthcoming attractions  
Updated the pic and quote on the home page  
This Week's pinup (full HD wallpaper ...)  
Pick of the Week   
All the previews. Remember to check with the cinema first.  
List of all movies showing  
Same list sorted by Age Restriction  
Top Twenty, Best and Worst Movies by Critical Rating.  
Remember you can support the site by reading the ads... :-) 
Thanks, Ian 
At our weekly Bible study, the leader asked an elderly gentleman, Walt, to  
open the meeting with prayer.  
Walt did so in a soft voice.  
Another man, straining to hear, shouted, “I can’t hear you!”  
Walt replied, “I wasn’t talking to you.” 
We ran into our minister at the mall, but my son couldn’t place him.  
It was only later that it hit him.  
“I know that man,” he said. “He goes to our church.” 
Tunisians, I’ve learned, are known for being generous with compliments.  
As I walked along the harbour with my husband one day, a Tunisian man  
shouted to him, “Hey, you a very lucky man! Your woman has big legs!”  
I could have done without such flattery. 
Throughout our tour of an early American bathhouse in Hot Springs,  
Arkansas, I explained to my four-year-old grandson what people once did  
When we came upon a mannequin at a desk, I told him,  
“She was probably writing a letter home to her friends telling them about  
her vacation to Hot Springs.”  
My grandson asked, “And then she died and they stuffed her?” 
On our way to go spelunking, we got lost on a country road.  
We stopped to ask a farmer, “Is this the road to Waynesville?”  
“Yes, it is,” he replied.  
As we started to drive off, we barely heard him add,  
“But you’re going the wrong way.” 
At an art gallery, a woman and her ten-year-old son were having a tough  
time choosing between one of my paintings and another artist’s work.  
They finally went with mine.  
“I guess you decided you prefer an autumn scene to a floral,” I said.  
“No,” said the boy.  
“Your painting’s wider, so it’ll cover three holes in our wall.” 
During a faculty meeting at our school, our principal grew frustrated with  
the lack of attention he felt was his due.  
Raising his voice, he shouted,  
“Listen, people. Communication is a two-way street.  
When I talk, you have to listen.” 
While interviewing a candidate for a receptionist position, I asked:  
“What do you see in yourself that you’d like to improve?”  
Her response: “My breasts.” 
My friend, an intern, was given $50 to get the chairman of the bank some  
Told to get himself something, he bought a shirt. 

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