Newsletter and jokes 18 March 2022


 
Hi all 
 
An international line-up this week, with something from Europe, America,  
India and Japan. 
 
First up, for the kiddies, is Fireheart, which borrows a few ideas from  
Mulan and adds some Daddy issues.  
 
Turning the heat up more, The Contractor is a classic action thriller to  
get your adrenalin pupming. 
 
From India, we have another action comedy with a bit of romance on the side. 
 
Lastly, from Japan, some spirited sword play in the anime Gekijouban Jujutsu  
Kaisen 0, which is rated 16... not for the kiddies. 
 
On the previews side, there are plenty of previews on both Saturday and 
the public holiday on Monday for next week's release, Ambulance. See the  
previews page for venues. 
 
New this week: 
 
* Fireheart (PG7-9 VP) 
* The Contractor (16 LV) 
* Gekijouban Jujutsu Kaisen 0 (16 LVH) 
* Bachchhan Paandey (possibly 16) 
 
https://www.moviesite.co.za/new.htm   
 
Forthcoming attractions 
https://www.moviesite.co.za/4thcome.htm  
 
Updated the pic and quote on the home page 
https://www.moviesite.co.za/  
 
This Week's pinup 
https://www.moviesite.co.za/pinup.html (full HD wallpaper ...)  
 
List of all movies showing 
https://www.moviesite.co.za/reviews.htm  
 
Same list sorted by Age Restriction 
https://www.moviesite.co.za/showingbyage.htm  
 
Showtimes 
https://www.moviesite.co.za/where.htm  
 
Remember you can support the site by reading the ads... :-) 
 
Enjoy :-) 
 
Cheers, Ian 
 
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I noticed my neighbour was pregnant again and, out shopping one day, I met  
her and her small son. 
 
I asked her young son whether he wanted his mummy's baby to be a boy or a  
girl. 
 
He looked at me very intently and retorted, "I want the baby to be Batman!". 
 
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My mother moved towns and went for her first visit to her new doctor’s 
surgery. The doctor looked through her extensive medical notes on the 
computer containing her health history and then looked at my mother again. 
 
He commented, "I am pleased to say, with utmost certainty, that you 
look a whole lot better in person than you do online”. 
 
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My rule is that if I wasn’t invited to someone’s wedding, then they’re 
not invited to mine, and I don’t care if that upsets my parents. 
 
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In my school days I used to bury my head in the sand.  
 
Eventually he expelled me. 
 
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I wish somebody would do something about my lack of initiative. 
 
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I’m concerned by the news of Steps reforming.  
 
These things can really escalate. 
 
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I used to get teased quite a lot at school because I bore a slight  
resemblance to a bowl of custard. 
 
Luckily I had quite a thick skin. 
 
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I just read a press release from Heinz saying “We will never, ever make a  
Bolognese version of Alphabetti Spaghetti.”  
 
I thought, Blimey, they don’t mince their words. 
 
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My five-year-old told me she can’t help me clean up her toys because she’s  
tired from all the work she does at school.  
 
When I asked her what she meant by “work,” she answered, 
 
“They’re always making us write our names.” 
 
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Twitter: We’d never collect anything. 
 
Apple: We securely encrypt everything on-device. 
 
Facebook: Here’s an ad for something you dreamt about. 
 
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Has COVID-19 forced you to wear a mask and glasses at the same time?  
 
You may be entitled to condensation. 
 
 
 



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