Newsletter and jokes 22 April 2022

Hi all 
Four new movies this week, headlined by a somewhat "Romancing the Stone" 
remake that did well overseas, entitled The Lost City. 
Nicolas Cage plays himself in the caper The Unbearable Weight of Massive  
Talent, which is on at major venues. 
For the kiddies, we have the animated treat Chickenhare and the Hamster of  
Darkness, in both 2D and 3D. 
Sodium Day is a new local release set on the Cape Flats, which is on at  
selected venues. 
The filmed theatre local play Askari is showing at the Nouveaus and similar. 
* Chickenhare and the Hamster of Darkness (3D) (PG V) 
* Chickenhare and the Hamster of Darkness (PG V) 
* The Lost City (13 LV) 
* The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent (16 LVD) 
* Sodium Day 18 (LVPD)   
Forthcoming attractions  
Updated the pic and quote on the home page  
This Week's pinup (full HD wallpaper ...)  
List of all movies showing  
Same list sorted by Age Restriction  
Remember you can support the site by reading the ads... :-) 
Enjoy :-) 
Cheers, Ian 
After giving what he considered a stirring, fact-filled campaign speech,  
the candidate looked out at his audience and confidently asked, 
“Now, are there any questions?” 
“Yes,” came a voice from the rear. 
“Who else is running?” 
A woman, bragging about how her husband plays handball and tennis, swims  
and indulges in all forms of exercise, inquired if her friend’s husband did  
“You could say so,” the second woman replied.  
“Just last week he was out seven nights running.” 
“What possible excuse can you give for acquitting this defendant?“ the  
judge shouted at the jury. 
“Insanity, Your Honor,” replied the foreman. 
“All 12 of you?” 
The chief executive officer of Twitter called in his public relations  
director. “Listen, Wilson. Musk is trying to buy us out. It’s your job to  
get the price of our stock up so it’ll be too expensive for them. I don’t  
care how you do it, just do it!” 
The next day the price of the stock rose five points and then, the day  
after, another eight points. 
The CEO was delighted. “How did you do it, Wilson?” he asked. 
“I started a rumour Wall Street obviously liked.” 
“What was that?” 
“I told them you were resigning.” 
A ragged individual stranded for several months on a small desert island in 
the middle of the Pacific Ocean one day noticed a bottle lying in the sand  
with a piece of paper in it. 
"Due to lack of maintenance," he read, "we regretfully have found it  
necessary to cancel your e-mail account." 
A police officer sees a man driving around with a pickup truck full of  
He pulls the guy over and says: “You can’t drive around with penguins in  
this town! Take them to the zoo immediately.”  
The guy says OK, and drives away. 
The next day, the officer sees the guy still driving around with the truck  
full of penguins, and they’re all wearing sun glasses.  
He pulls the guy over and demands: “I thought I told you to take these  
penguins to the zoo yesterday?” 
The guy replies: “I did . . . today I’m taking them to the beach!” 
A lonely frog telephoned the Psychic Hotline and asked what his future holds.  
His Personal Psychic Advisor tells him:  
"You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know  
everything about you."  
The frog is thrilled, "This is great!  
"Will I meet her at a party?" he croaks.  
"No," says the psychic, "in biology class." 

Xax International logo
 Xax International
 All rights reserved.