Hi all A short week this week, with the new movies opening on the public holiday next Thursday. The big release this week is the final chapter (so they say) in the long- running "Jurassic" franchise. Unfortnately for its swansong, the critics were not over-impressed, although the public have been more forgiving. Also opening today is the Bollywood comedy Janhit Mein Jaari. On the arty side, you can catch Swan Lake ballet, Shaka Zulu stage play, and Turandot opera at selected venues. New this week * Jurassic World Dominion (3D) (13 VH) * Jurassic World Dominion (13 VH) * Jurassic World Dominion (3D IMAX) 13 VH) * Jurassic World Dominion (4DX) (13 VH) * Janhit Mein Jaari (Hindi) (probably 13) https://www.moviesite.co.za/new.htm Forthcoming attractions https://www.moviesite.co.za/4thcome.htm Updated the home page poster https://www.moviesite.co.za/ This Week's pinup https://www.moviesite.co.za/pinup.html (full HD wallpaper) List of all movies showing https://www.moviesite.co.za/reviews.htm Same list sorted by Age Restriction https://www.moviesite.co.za/showingbyage.htm Showtimes https://www.moviesite.co.za/where.htm Remember you can support the site by reading the ads... :-) Enjoy :-) Cheers, Ian --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Tired of boiling water every time you make pasta? Boil several litres at the start of the week and freeze it for later. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- SCENE: Bookstore. I answer the phone... “Hi, this is [Bookstore]. Can I help you?” CALLER: “Yes, do you have Ulysses in stock?” ME: “We have it in paperback and hardcover. Do you want me to put it aside for you?” CALLER: “What is the author’s name?” ME: “It’s James Joyce.” CALLER: “J-A-M-E-S- J-O-Y-C-E, ten letters... Thank you! I’m doing a crossword, and I needed the answer to this.” Click! --------------------------------------------------------------------------- My 12-year-old cousin asked my boyfriend, who’s a teacher, how he sleeps at night knowing he’s giving kids homework. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- My wife’s been working at home for more than a year now and has started complaining to me when her wireless connection is slow like I’m the office IT guy, so I made her submit a customer support ticket. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- When IT support goes to the dentist... DENTIST: So, are you flossing? ME: Are you using a unique password for every online account? --------------------------------------------------------------------------- I like rice. Rice is great when you’re hungry and you want 2000 of something. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- I am often asked, "Is google a man or a women?" My simple answer is: It's a woman because it won't let you finish your sentence without making a suggestion. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Justin Bieber got 100,000 retweets for tweeting "Live life full". That's just 3 random words. I'm going to try now. Jockstrap squirrel potatoes. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Before Instagram, I used to waste so much time sitting around having to imagine what my friends' food looked like. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- I follow the CIA on Twitter just so they can see how it feels. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Why do you keep going back to that fishing website?" "I can't help it, I'm hooked." --------------------------------------------------------------------------- If Tinder has taught me one thing it's that there is an extraordinary amount of single girls named Shelby that love to ride horses. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- A few guys tried to follow Chuck Norris during a light workout while he was vacationing in Hawaii. It's now called the Ironman Triathlon.