Newsletter and jokes 15 March 2019

Hi all 
And a happy Ides of March to you all ... I'm surprised the Yanks haven't 
commercialised it yet ... we can all dress up like Romans and carry large 
plastic knives around .... 
Nah, probably a bad idea.... :-) 
School is out and the kids are running wild ... in a manner of speaking. 
And so we have some typical holiday fare on offer this week, joining last 
week's arrive Captain Marvel, which is doing very well at the box office. 
First up for the kiddies is the animated funfair fest Wonder Park, which  
has not released Stateside yet. That's joined by Fighting With My Family, 
with The Rock in a supporting role. Despite the 13 LVD IAT Age Restriction 
it is said to be a great family movie. 
Then we have two very different local films, aimed at different markets. 
Firstly Die Stropers (aka The Harvesters) which was in the running to be 
our Oscar entrant, and then the boy-meets-girl-culture-clash surfing movie 
Deep End. 
Lastly Bollywood rolls out the family comedy Mere Pyare Prime Minister. 
No previews this week, but note that due to the holiday next Thursday,  
which, combined with the fact that it's school holidays so many people will 
be taking a long week-end, means that the new movies open on Wednesday 
next week. So this week only runs till next Tuesday. 
Enjoy :-) 
Releasing 15 March 2019 
* Wonder Park (3D) (PG V) 
* Wonder Park (PG V) 
* Fighting with My Family (13 LVD IAT) 
* Die Stropers (16 LVPD) 
* Deep End (13 LVPD) 
* Mere Pyare Prime Minister (Hindi)   
Forthcoming attractions  
Updated the pic and quote on the home page  
This Week's pinup (>Full HD wallpaper ...)  
Pick of the Week   
All the previews. Remember to check with the cinema first.  
List of all movies showing  
Same list sorted by Age Restriction  
Top Twenty, Best and Worst Movies by Critical Rating.  
Remember you can support the site by reading the ads... :-) 
Cheers, Ian 
Billy Corgan, the lead singer of the rock band Smashing Pumpkins, on the  
perils of life as a rock star:  
“I’ve moved on to other things. Obviously I love rock ’n’ roll, and I love  
music, but it’s nice to be in a world like professional wrestling, where  
I’m treated like a normal person.” 
My husband was at a dinner with colleagues, and one of them had too much to  
drink. Feeling drowsy, the poor man sank back into his chair and said,  
“I don’t feel good. I’m going into screen saver mode.” 
While I was working as a store Santa, a boy asked me for an electric train  
“If you get your train,” I told him, “your dad is going to want to play  
with it too. Is that all right?” 
The boy became very quiet. So, moving the conversation along, I asked,  
“What else would you like Santa to bring you?” 
He promptly replied, “Another train.” 
My son is a firefighter. He and a few colleagues conducted fire-safety  
checks at a housing complex on what just happened to be Halloween. When  
they called on one elderly gentleman, he looked them up and down, and said,  
“You’re a bit too old for this, don’t you think?” and slammed the door on  
Analyst: I can give you the numbers, but you can’t go public with it. 
Marketing manager: I’m not going to go public with it. I’ll just present it 
at a meeting. 
Analyst: Who’s going to be at the meeting? 
Marketing manager: It’s a stakeholder meeting. So whoever wants to come.  
You know, it’s open to the public. 
Before LinkedIn, I didn’t know any strangers. 
My husband was leaving a diner just as it began to rain. Forgetting that he  
hadn’t brought an umbrella, he reached for the nearest one as he headed for  
the door.  
“That’s my umbrella,” a woman scolded. 
Embarrassed, he hurried off to work. Once there, he discovered three  
umbrellas that he had left at the office over the months and decided to  
bring them home at the end of the day.  
That afternoon, he ran into the woman from the diner. She took one look at  
the umbrellas and remarked,  
“You did real well for yourself today, didn’t you?” 

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